what does sabrina say?

'on va se mimoser......'
bring on the champagne

perspectives

I.
you have your australian girl but at least i have my dignity.

II.
miss maggie hall tore all he petals off of all the rosebuds.
"better to destroy it now than to let it slowly disappoint you."

III.
we were just manifestations of each other's self loathing.

kinder

berlin tea
in germany
you and me



we
will
see.

a wall is a wall is a wall

berlin is hot and shocking

two years ago
i was here

trying desperately to stop my own passivity and fall totally in love

this time
...(lets just say)
the irony is not lost on me

your sad fate

you
had
two
girlfriends
and
now
you
have
none.

la fin de la fin de la fin

maybe my heart is bigger than your heart?
and my eyes half closed.
your lies would be less bitter if you thought you were wrong

but you aren' t the only one spinning stories
i lied too-- when i told you i love you

i thought i loved you
i thought i loved you because it was hard



you can spend 10 hours making a cake

but no one will eat it

if there's no sugar inside.

the offer

a little list on yellow legal pad
one side: [france]
one side: [US]
a silly little list

both sides, started organized and with straight penmanship, suddenly falling apart- turning to scribbled words, double underlining, circles and stars

pain au chocolat*notre dame*parc des poetes*the firm*les marches aux puces*steak tartar*

my brother*convenience*a garden*thanksgiving*the comfort*service*heat

...
the autumn wind*bordeaux with the girls*cobblestone*verlan text messages*centre pompidou*

a big kitchen*craft stores*netflix nights with gin and tonic*brunches*florida beaches from my youth...



when i start listing names it gets really messy.


there is no man on either side
and my heart seems to be

just in the middle
<3

jealous

he said
i thought of you last night
\
my eyes light up
yeah?
/
i watched a film with a /very/ jealous boyfriend
he called and she didn't answer
he went all the way to her house screaming!!
\\\///

i said




from you?




not funny.

coincé

we stopped to kiss in front of the catholic church on rue poincarré after a dinner of tartar at my favorite little place. "jolie église" he said. his eyes grazed my body,

"you're wearing a white dress" he said, and lightly tugged my wrist toward the church doors.

the last time we slept together we didn't even make love. we were both so tired. so tired.

its always a problem connecting people and places. to the extent that leaving one makes leaving the other seem like the only option.

text message inbox poem; a lesson in rendez-vous

Question: whats the university downtown nola?

Be there asap - yo got into a fight with a fellow q-er

hey honey lets go to the soldes this weekend!

compte principale épuisé. pensez a appeller le 224 pour recharger.

je suis invite?

try to find a taxi baby

nous sommes a gare montparnasse

i love you too-- ne me trompe pas stp

want to meet at scossa at 6 30 or so? biz

j'arrive ma cherie

soutenir

i finally understand housewives




because i need one

the bright side

it is still blue


hate to say - - i told me so

ow

it hurts:






my heart.



tu dis des mots automatiques pendant que mon coeur brise.

slowmotion

a few weeks in s l o w m o t i o n and
existential crises at
3AM in his bathroom
he doesn’t know how to handle me like this

waiting for the bus
and some guy on a bike says
“you have beautiful blue eyes. are you lost?”
I just look at him
you have no idea....

between the devil and the deep blue sea

dolly parton keeps telling me she'll
always love me
and this cheap bottle of gin means
its exam time.

outside the rain is tapping on the glass roof
and i'm staring at droit fiscal
i know that means tax law
(and thats about all i know)

i didn't count any chickens yet, at least

but failure sounds sweeter in another tongue
and all i want is champagne and kisses
(sometimes people are too accommodating.)

peach and i lived la vie boheme for 48 hours sugary and crisp
i miss her musical voice
back in london, non-school land, lovers bliss

why did i think this was a good idea?
i've got no sense to come in when it hails.
[i'll go back to the firm tomorrow and pretend that it doesn't exist and that i am done with all this nonsense and have a joblife instead of incessant jlobbery-glook.]

if i fail the little white daisies will still be there
and the powder blue sky
B is for bombshell and buttons and ohmeomeohmy
and the champagne and kisses

even though my insides will be mustery mush moosh

slice of the south

a little part of me
is .foreverchanged.
since i found a
magnolia tree
in paris

wuv

if you were a chapter book
and i was a 5th grader


i would write my book report on you
with a shoebox diorama.

april was

april was the fastest time
the 1-2 step
to a 5-9 tempo

i'm crawling into the oasis
to drink every bit of him

one two three four

precipitation anticipation

I can’t exactly put my finger on it, but something about the walk home from Cambronne always reminds me of playing outside in the early summer in Georgia. Maybe it’s the fact that there are a lot of leafy green trees on some of the roads that I take. Maybe it’s the calm feeling I get when I leave Charlie’s apartment and stretch my legs a little, with smoky hair and my ballerina slippers. Maybe it’s the poppies in the park, or the little kids on the swingsets.

Today was not an exception. Sunday afternoon and sunny, slight breeze. And then all of a sudden the sky turned very dark and the breeze became a bit more menacing, several large raindrops fell on my forehead.

All I could think of is that moment when you are on your bike, a mile from home, circling around your little girlfriends, and that feeling arrives. The blue shifts, the wind flips your ponytail, and you know you better step on it, fast, if you want to make it home before the sky opens up and empties itself of all those hot summer raindrops.

The kind that sizzle and pop when they hit the hot hot black pavement, letting off puffs of steam.

men explain things to me

men

explain this

crazy

complicated

mixed up world

that I just can’t seem to wrap my little girl head around.

and the best part is,

I don’t even have to ask!